How to manage toddlers and wall outlets
An example of the difference between instructions, warnings, enforcements, and more.
The best way to give a toddler an electric shock is by saying, “don’t poke wall outlets.” (Instructions can trigger curiosity.)
The best way to prevent so is by saying, “don’t poke wall outlets, or they will hurt you badly.” (warning)
The best way to stop the toddler from doing it again — in the case of an accidental poke didn’t deliver the shock (and hence also not the lesson) — is by saying, “don’t poke wall outlets, or they will hurt you badly; if they didn’t, I’ll make sure you do.” (enforcement)
The best way to detect when your toddler is tempted to poke an outlet is by saying “huzzah!” every time you’re about to plug in anything. Whenever you hear an adorable “huzzah!”, you know someone is up for no good. (Pavlovian conditioning)
The best way to let the toddler forget about wall outlets at all is by saying, “little Billy next door is poking something much more fun.” (Orwellian distraction)
The best way to make use of that curiosity is by saying, “if you graduate and become neurosurgeon next year, you can poke one on your birthday.” (exploitation)
The best way to prevent poking outlets and teach them to lie is by saying, “every time you refrain from poking an outlet, you can get a Mars Bar.” (incentives without audits)
The best way to 10x your impact is by saying, “every time you stop a friend from kindergarten from poking an outlet, you can get a Mars Bar.” (best snack)
Don’t take parenting advices from me.
